Friday, May 15, 2009

loves music. loves to dance.

For Christmas, we had given Michael my old green iPod.  I filled it with his favorites songs of the moment.  He loved it.  And would wear his headphones around the house singing as loud as he could.  He only knew the very end of each phrase and would yell that word as loudly as he could.  But in tune.  That's my boy.

His most requested songs in the car were:  Citizen Soldier (Three Doors Down);  Battle Cry (Pillar); Stronger (Kanye West) and I Run For Life (Melissa Ethredge).  What can I say?  He had eclectic tastes.  He also liked Hey There Delilah (the Plain White Ts) and though he would never admit it, I think he very much enjoyed my Broadway soundtracks.  Or maybe I will just tell myself that he liked it since I subjected him to it ... over and over again.

He also was a dancer and would bop around the house.  So funny to see him.  His signature dance move was what I can only describe as a booty shake.  It was awesome.  I tried to get Michael involved in clogging with me.  Turns out he just went for the pretzels.  But would watch me clog.  While he ate.  Stinker.

We used to hold Friday night dance parties - where we would turn on the tunes and dance.  Even our dog, Nellie, joined in.  Though she is not very good at the hip hop.  Of course, neither were we, so it all balanced out.

When it was bedtime, I usually sang songs to him.  Even as he got older, he wanted me to sing to him.  I am not a great singer, but to Michael, I had the voice of Kristin Chenoweth.  I'm certain of it.  I sang him You are my Sunshine.  And I adapted the words from I love you Conrad (from Bye Bye Birdie) to I love you Michael.  I also sang Twinkle Star.  And Fifty Nifty United States - mostly just the alphabetized listing of states.   I would sing it as fast as I could.  And he always asked for me to do it again.

I wonder what he would have done with his love of music.  Would he have picked up a guitar at some point?  He enjoyed making up his own songs and singing them in the shower.  Would he have written music?  Would he have joined chorus in high school?  Would he have sang the songs that he so loved to his kids as he tucked them in?

What could have been?  A hard thought.


keri said... sound like you were such a fun mom to michael!! your love for him is so evident...i can just totally picture you guys dancing and smiling and singing. you were both so fortunate to have each other. thanks for sharing all of these stories with us!

Anonymous said...

Well, he definitely would have picked up a guitar at some point if I had anything to do with it! My best memory of Michael will always be Michael in his Tux and Ball Cap dancing at your wedding. I would have loved to give him his first stringed instrument, as Uncle Don did for me when I was 12 years old. Thank you for sharing!
Love you to the moon and back,

Elcnu Mot

Kim said...

A hard thought, indeed and I'm sure one of thousands a day. Even though the world is moving forward, those of us close to you still feel moments like this ourselves and can only imagine the REAL pain. And even though you may always have the pain of missed opportunities, you can be sure of the fact that you never missed out on life while Michael was alive. He LIVED such an awesome life because of you! Baby steps, my friend...LOVE YOU!