Saturday, October 31, 2009

halloween

Oh, Halloween. One of Michael's favorite days. Any excuse to dress up, he was in. And to get candy for it? Pure bliss. I thought I would share some of Michael's costumes from years past...





Missing my boy. Happy Halloween.
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I have decided to blog every day during the month of November. I have found this blog to be helpful to me as I write out my thoughts. I haven't made the time to do it and have challenged myself to find time to write. everyday.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

It has been 6 months. Half a year.

We are entering into the Holiday season.

I went to Kohl's last week. Hoping to find some shoes. I didn't find any.
But as I turned the corner to head back to the down escalator. I heard it. The first Christmas song. Deck the Halls, I think. And I saw it. Christmas decorations. Trees and ornaments. Tears sprang to my eyes and I quickly found my way back to the downstairs. To the safety that is still October.

I had the same reaction to Halloween decorations at Target. Michael loved to dress up. And to get candy for it? He was a fan. It was a favorite day to be sure.

I considered turning off our lights this Halloween. Let the trick-or-treaters go else where. We are closed. But that seems false too. And not in the spirit of my son. So we will hand out sweet treats to princesses and super heroes. This first Halloween. Without my son turned Star Wars bounty hunter.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

ugly

I find it difficult to blog right now.
I am a mix of ugly emotions. Bitter. Angry. Lonely. Sad. Jealous.
I find it difficult to pray.
I am awkward in groups. And in singles.
I'm working through it. Thank you for bearing with me.